I'm a little late but it's not the next Friday yet so IT'S FINE. This is it y'all the TALENT SHOW YAYAYAYY I'm so excited to talk about this! Although obviously the talent show challenge has a history of being fun-filled with original recording numbers...I'm looking at you Season 17 (although they were really good so I'm not really complaining)...I think that this season is shaping up to be a little different!! This will be a shorter post (edit: no it won't lol) since only six of the girls performed, but we are really gonna get in there so this should be fun! I'm also gonna go in order from my most to least favorite, because I can!
Juicy Love Dion:
OH MY ACTUAL GOD I was gearing up for a spectacular performance from Juicy but HOLY HELL SHE STILL SHOCKED MY PANTS OFF WTF! I have watched her number on repeat at LEAST 18 times (definitely more) and I find more to love about it each time. I love the audio track and I want an extended version on Spotify NEEEEOOOOOOWWWW. It's so catchy and then with THOSE MOVEMENTS omg hunny it's all over the screen (sorry! but not really...)! Her handstand into a split gets me together every fuckin time I can never get sick of that. This, I will confidently say, is my favorite talent show performance of all time, tied with Aja's in AS3. Juicy I LOVE YOU GIRL KEEP IT UPPPP.
Nini Coco:
Okay Nini!! With the back handspring HELLO? ate that. I know I know I know she went viral for that number whatever WHATEVER IDC. She does this bit SO WELL and it's so cute and clean cut and like UGHHHHHHHH Nini I love you! She is so so good at hitting all of the little nuances and everything, chef's kiss!
Mia Starr:
DON'T COME FOR ME FOR PUTTING MIA THIRD. She was INSANELY good and her movements are so signature and professional (duh) she did a magnificent job. I liked the little cut to a diff beat halfway through too, very good. THE CROSS JUMP CLAP x2 MOVEEEEE got me girl that was so fab LOVE!! I only dock points for the face and hair girl, what was going on lowk...am I the only one who thought the mug was a little muddy? And the hair, especially the first, was nawttttt it, but those are legit my only notes it was fantastic otherwise!
Darlene Mitchell;
Darlene my sweet angel baby sugar muffin okay I'll stop now. DARLENE IS SO MF CUTEEEEEE she is so charming, and literally she is the ONLY and I mean ONLY person who could pull off this number...that was meant to be slightly shady hahaaa! This number was lowkey not really much of anything BUTTTTT I think it shows off what Darlene is good at: MAKING PEOPLE SMILE JUST BY LOOKING AT HER PRANCE AROUND! Her lipsyncing was on point, she hit the nuances like Nini, and that little butt wiggle she did after the solemn part OHMYGOD Jane was laughing at that too HAHA she's soooo cutie patootie. MYKI VOTED HER 6TH Myki I feel betrayeddd smh. Anyways, ILOVEUDARLENE!
Ciarra Myst:
Y'ALL. Be so fucking serious with me right now, this was good. Ciarra performed her poem so well and so intensely, everyone looked uncomfortable and that's why they claimed to not like it but BRO THAT WAS THE POINTTTT! IT'S INTENSE AND IT MAKES U FEEL SOMETHING. This did not deserve a bottom placement, and I'm so sad for her. JUSTICE FOR CIARRA. On one more note, if y'all didn't see pit Stop for this ep yet go watch it neowwww THORGY IS BACK and funnier than ever LOL she presented a few lovely variants of her poetry it was soooooo funny.
Vita Vontesse Starr:
This was shit from a BUTTTTTTT what! Holy hell I don't even know what this was supposed to be she was steppin and touchin and doing the bare fuckin minimum I hateddddd this. Vita, sure you can sew but like...girl. WHAT IS GOING AWNNNNNNN. This deserved bottom placement by a long long long shot and that would've been the case if the strategizing wasn't as dramatic and obnoxious as it was.
My 'Excessive Strategizing' Lament
Bro what was happening with the werk room screen time this episode the strategizing took up the whole 90 mins! BRO the maxi challenge technically lasted like- max 8 minutes WHAT ARE WE DOING! Bye. I hated everything that was happening this is some All Stars bullshit SAVE IT!
"I hate myself today, I hate myself tomorrow. I HATE MYSELF. I hate EVERYTHING. And that is my poetry." -Thorgy Thor on Pit Stop
Extra Notes!
Alright, I kinda complained a lot already so I'm just going to discuss the runways very briefly here LOL that was shady but idfc!
This runway was terrible guys, like really really bad overall. I hate this category, satin is just so blahhhh where's the fun! Myki, Juicy, and DARE I SAY DISCORD? were the only ones who ate this in any capacity. Nini was realllll close but idk there was a lot going one and it didn't fully give satin yk? I'm pissed that people didn't see the reference with Discord's look, I LOVE CRUELLA and I clocked that reference immediately I loveeeee it sososo much, haters say what you will. I'm super proud of Myki too, this look was so beautiful and the colors were kind of a niche choice but it worked so will MUAH i loved it. Can't wait for Fashion Photo Ruview tonight.
Last thing, I think I really need to emphasize how important it is that y'all watch Pit Stop with Miss Thorgy Thor SHE IS SOOOOOOO FUNNY I CANNOT WITH HER she is so unhinged and smart HAHAHA I literally have prayed for days like this especially after the boring ass guests we've had so far...Marcia...
Lipsync and Final Thoughts
This lipsync was giving Anetra versus Sasha Colby in the way that WE WERE ALLLLLLL WANTING THIS TO HAPPEN. Pro dancer versus pro dancer, what more could you want. I do wish they had picked a different Zara song, but it's okay at least it wasn't a ballad or something that would've been TRAGIC. Great job to both, I dooooo think that Juicy won, but only by a small bit if anything. I'm happy with a tie!
Next week is gonna be SO LITTTT we have Kenya, Myki, Jane, Discord, and Athena left to go, I think we are gonna get something real good from all five of them. Yippee!
Current Winner Pick: ...Myki Meeks. I'm still a Myki-truther even though she's lowk been chilling..I believe in her I think she's gonna step it up. Honorable mentions go to Darlene Mitchell anddddd OH GOD IDK ANYMORE NINI? JANE? JUICYYYYYY????? Juicy is kinda eating everyone up y'all!
COME BACK NEXT WEEK FOR SOME SHENANIGANS FOOLISHNESS AND GOOFERY MUAH MUAH ciao!